Apocalypse Diaries

by Ray Zimmerman

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You know I won’t request, I’m sure at least you can attest, That much is true But be placed under no doubt, That underneath I’m crying out, My love for you, I do not find it easy to say, That I might be made of stone my love but this stone’s made of clay, And I know I do not make it easy to see, But sometimes all I need is for your loving arms to hold me, If you only knew, When you hold me like you do, You will be my shelter, You’re my solitude, I barely understand, So don’t ask just take my hand, And we can dream The way I tend to think, Cannot be written into ink, Or so it seems, You should know that I would never dare, Grant license to another whom I’d permit to stroke my hair, And I know I do not make it easy to see, But sometimes all I need is for your loving arms to hold me, And if all there ever is is two of us, I’d only ask you’d stay here at my side, I’ll do anything you say, you need only lead the way, Without you I am lost in the swell of the passing tide
Tell me I can't hear you say, So come and whisper in my ear, Yeah babe I know you're right we're normally going somewhere nice right around this time of year, Tell me all about your dreams, Tell me everything you saw, Yeah me and you driving low top quick stop then hit the road just a little more, Loved so long with so little to lose, It'd be fine if we decided to choose to slow down, Just a little bit of time, Let me check my understanding that we won't be, For a little while, Holding hands and sleeping under palm trees, And it makes me smile, Cos we're a long long way from Monterey Bay, Come and listen to me baby when I say, That it might be a while that we have to stay, But me and you plus one's like riding on the freeway, I wonder if we'll ever turn back, I must admit that I don't care, It's been a long time coming but I'll tell you honey couple things I've been meaning to share, Been holding your hand since we were small, Got a lot of love but soon that ain't all, We got a little roadtripper on the backseat, bout 20 inches tall
Leaves are getting lighter, Air is getting sharper by the day, Days are getting shorter, So the nights are growing longer the same way, But the stars, shine brightest in the darkness, My arms hold you tighter in the cold, This frozen air reminds me of my heart before I met you, So I’ll tell you now all I have fortold, We’ll keep each other warm when the winter comes, We’ll light the fire and then we’ll close the blinds, You’ll lay down here to rest your eyes and I’ll lay down beside, So come in love cos it’s getting dark outside, In the morning snow will fall, you’ll be dancing through the hall, In fits of laughter, I’ll ask you what’s this all about, you’ll say it’s that now I have no doubt, This is happy ever after, But fairytales don’t make princesses like you, They don’t shine as brightly as you do, Pack a bag we’ve tales to write of two lovers passing through, And we’ll tell them of the days when the freezing wind blew Do you hear the choirs calling, Of the songbirds at the breaking of the morning, Your departure they are rapidly forestalling, And the fire in my heart for you is roaring
Who goes there in the darkness was Gemimas inquisition, To the shadow she saw moving that had first raised her suspicion, Don’t shoot came the reply, please permit first to try, Explain the roads I’ve travelled to be stood outside your door, You’ve got 60 seconds she said then I’m gonna drop you on the floor, The shotgun that she carried he thought was a little overreaction, But as it turned out her ammo belt wasn’t his biggest distraction, It was that he thought she looked pretty cute, in her bulletproof army issue boots, Then she told him it’s your final warning said you’d best be talking fast, You might want to sit down he said it’s quite a story I’ve amassed, And there was something in the way he said it, That made her put her weapon down, She said okay fine, just come inside, but if you put just one foot out of line, I won’t hesitate to put you 6 feet under ground, When Billy met Gemima they didn’t know what they’d become, Seems not even the apocalypse can stop 2 hearts becoming 1, He proceeded to regale the stories of the roads that he had walked, It was only when the sunrise came he realised how much he had talked, I’m sorry girl for wasting so much of your precious time, In fact it’s kinda nice she said I guess you can stay inside, In that case let me ask you and my names Billy did I say, Have you always been here on your own how did you manage to get away, I thought that there was no one else, just myself I and me, I cannot tell you how happy I was when you pointed that gun at me, And please do tell did you see it as it fell I always wondered what I’d missed She looked at Billy inquisitively and said it didn’t fall it slipped, When Billy met Gemima they talked all through the night, It was the first time in a while they thought it might turn out all right, They filled their hours in the days back then, planting flowers they said let’s pretend, That we’re just on vacation and we can go home any time we like, But Billy could see it in Gemima’s eyes, the little red marks from the tears she’d dried, And asked her my love is there anything I can do, You’ve already done so much for me she said, I couldn’t ask for anything more from you, My Gemima I know that you are yearning wondering if there’s more, I always knew we’d have to go back out there to explore, Just know my love it pains me so cos I’ve seen so many things, There’s a lot of nightmares out there waiting for you in the wings, And then that night she tossed and turned and wrestled with her mind, I’m certain now I must go but I cannot make hm leave this all behind, When Billy met Gemima he should have prepared to be bereft, Like he was that Autumn morning reading the note that she had left, Winter came and winter went, Gemima gave up hope for lent, But by that time she’d forgotten her way home, Billy I hope you’re safe she prayed, I’m sorry I left I wish I’d stayed, I’m so scared that I came out here on my own, And monsters crept into her dreams of everything that she had seen, The demons he had warned her all about, If I don’t find a way real soon, I’m getting scared of what I’ll do, there must be a way to get them out, When Billy met Gemima she didn’t know she’d end up here, Somewhere in the middle of desolation dread and fear, It was a cold and crisp October day, when she finally thought she’d find a way, So she went and climbed the highest mountain she could find, Billy when I leave this earth,I’ll tell you this for what it’s worth, When I depart I’ll have only you on my mind, Then Gemima took a running leap, and began dropping as she’d planned, But before she’d fallen too far down she felt something grab her hand, Gemima my love I’ve travelled far and wide, I could bear no longer to be from your side, I left all we had behind I swear it’s true, I gathered all my strength and pride and through blackest nights I rode astride, A steed made only of my love for you, And when all hope appeared lost, I dreamt of the night our paths first crossed, And when I woke I somehow knew the way, Gemima when I caught your hand just now, I knew I must, if you’ll allow, take a moment finally to say, I love you more than you could know, I can pull you up and take you home, Unless you’ve got more searching out here to do Billy she cried, will you make me your bride, I never again want to be from your side I want to spend all the rest of my days with you When Billy met Gemima all the world was falling down, Their thoughts turned to repopulation from the love that they had found So gather round now children and hear how this story ends, So you’ll be in no doubt when you shout it out to all of your little friends, When Billy met Gemima it was quite some time ago Evidently they wished to leave a note that they etched into this stone So come and see the inscription here, and read it nice and slow, This is what they thought to leave behind, so that all of us would know, I’m Billy I’m Gemima is how the scripture goes This life sure goes easier if you find someone to share the blows I’m afraid there is no magic trick, that will assist in breaking through, But in the spirit of cooperation we’ll leave behind this clue Be ready with your loving arms for girls wearing army boots, And offer up your heart and soul if she points her shotgun straight at you
When you arrive, will you look for me, I have waited for you, for many days When you get here, place your head at my chest, And my beating heart, will play a simple phrase I cannot say that I know now, What I'm supposed to do, Just always know close to your little heart, There will be another two, These are the lullabies, these are the lullabies, That I will sing you, These are the lullabies, these are the lullabies, That I will sing to you, And know if soon if you cannot sleep, I'll be by your side, And I would sing for a thousand years, Just to ease your troubled mind, I wonder if you're listening, do you recognise my voice, I will sing to you, as softly as I am able Will it soothe you when you feel you're alone, As your mothers arm slowly rock your cradle
What's in your head who knows, Butterflies and rainbows, I've stopped trying to understand all the things that you got planned, You make me smile, when you Tell me how you'd like to, be up in lights so you, Could see all of your fans watch them clap their little hands, You should know, that you You don't have to be a star, I love you girl the way you are, In fact from my perspective, thought it's kind of subjective, The way you're going's going pretty far don't you know that you, You're just like a bubble And you burst a little easy when you get into trouble, But I know you and now I can see, you'll be flying higher than a big ol' tree cos, You, you, you, you're just like a bubble to me I wonder what you might say when you're older on your birthday, Gift wrapped, jam packed cake because in fact, I know you like it that way, And I know that you might smile, 'cos the way it's your style, It's tailor made for you I'm glad you stayed and by the way, who knew That you don't have to be a star, You're perfect just the way you are, In fact from my perspective, thought it's kind of subjective, The way you're going's going pretty far don't you know that you,
You’re red, you’re blue, what’s the matter with you, You’re black you’re white, you ain’t thinking right, You’re too far right, you’re too far left, He said there’s spies in the East, she said there’s lies in the west, Hypocrites, lunatics, misfits and politics, He whispers resurrection while she cries apocalypse He said we’re one but she says we’re not, There’s not enough spoons in this big mixing pot, He prays to God but she bows to none, She said my body’s all mine, he said I think that you’re wrong, His back aches from stooping but he stands to proclaim, Only place at my feet at most half of the blame, Read to me the rules, for they’ll soon be up in flames, There’ll be no more referees left soon in your inconsequential games, But before you criticise make sure to amend, Your thoughts and opinions as so not to offend, And tell me are you different to the ones that are speaking, Your guilt should run quickly if it is shelter you are seeking, Tell me who held your tongue so firmly in grasp, Who bound the lips on your invisible mask, To watch fallen kings descend far from their perch, But only into feathers that are plucked by their church, Stop with your rhetoric and constant foreboding The illusion you are building is more rapidly eroding, The pipes to your chambers are surely corroding, Seemingly faster than the speed you were hoping, Spin the wheel, drink the last glass of champagne, There’ll be no more attendants left soon in your inconsequential games, You’re him, you’re her, it’s hard to concur, But be quickly assured you’ve not been asked to prefer, Either or the other you’re neither father nor mother, They’ll bleed just like you and your sister and brother, Your revolution falters only quietly ordained, To those who would stay to hear you explain, That this world is gone it is lost it is stained, But attention turns quickly when your neck is so trained Your stones are rebounding leave no mark on the walls, The boots of your soldiers are starting to stall, Replaced quickly instead with deafening calls, Made from trading and handshakes in invisible halls, Make your choice, draw your cards and stake your claim, There’ll be no more pieces left soon in your inconsequential games, They declare these credentials are all that is required, We have not come to lead but you’ll leave here inspired, You should know those certificates have long since expired, You’re just old men now you’ll soon be retired Weight the dice, and keep on winning ‘til you ascertain, That there’ll be no more players left soon in your inconsequential games,
How’ve you been feeling lately, You been walking round kind of sedately, So I’m just gonna tell is straightly and I hope you won’t hate me I know you’ve been feeling down, Been carrying your blues around, So I thought you’d like to hear the sound of a few things I’ve found, See when I’m in your position, And I’m looking for a little ignition, I make a mission with a singular condition to write down all the things I like, And I’m a musician so I give a rendition and it goes a little bit like this, Hey why so serious You’re frowning face is dangerous I barely recognise you when you smile, Hey why so serious, I gotta say it’s mysterious, ‘Cos things been looking up for a little while, The sun’s been shining, and it’s extraordinary timing, That I’ve been finding that everything’s aligning, To looking up, looking on, that negativity is gone, So go ahead and sing ‘cos baby every little thing is starting to go your way, Maybe you can start to say, Have you been feeling brighter Are you rain clouds looking whiter, You’re certainly looking lighter from all the problems you shook off, Tell me what you gonna do next, What is it that we should expect, I don’t know where you’re going but I know you’re gonna be on top Looking on, looking up, looking fine, looking good, Go ahead and scream feels like I’m living in a dream, And now everything is going your way, So maybe you should start to say,
Will you come home to me, Cos I forgot to say before you turned to leave, That I love you more, than you know, Did I forget to say, I’ll just be waiting for you any time of day, And I miss you love, anytime you go, And all I wanna do is hold you babe, All I wanna do is kiss you one more time, For the road, Baby you’re all that I need, I’ll concede, that I don’t come to much without you, It’s clear to see, you’re the best part of me so I’m gonna tell you what I am gonna do, I’m gonna hold you and the sun is gonna shine I’m gonna think about you ‘til I’m out of my mind Gonna take you places they won’t know how to find, I’m gonna love you ‘til the end of time I think, that I should have known, That this feeling I’ve been having right inside of my bones, It’s been growing here, growing for a little while, I know that I should have guessed, That this beating I’ve been having right inside of my chest, It’s the same one I get, whenever I see you smile, You’ll be here with me in my dream I’ll be your stiches if you’ll be seams And I can hold you babe, the way I do,
Have you read the news about the footprints from his shoes, They leave the biggest prints you’ve ever seen, They say no walls can keep him out, that fleeing soldier do surely shout, Just run there’s no hope left or so it seems, For if he wiped his soles, They should leave some dirt behind, A mark to tell his captors he’s been set free, Have you heard of the sight of the bandana round his head, It's dripping nightmares made out of his sweat, The characters they craft are based more closely on the facts, Than even a drunk gambler would bet, And if you were to wring that cloth, Dancing naked on the hill, It would take all that is dry and make it wet, They say a nomad walks this way, With a heart of ice and eyes of flame, He follows none and none follows where he leads, They say at night if you hear the sound Of lightning breaking on the ground, That’s just the nomad as he stops to breathe Have you seen the scars on the clothes upon his back, The ones that do depict some tribulations, Given by ground covered fast, Running from spells that had been cast, By sorcerers with questionable reputations, So if you took it from his shoulders, And threw it hard into the ground, It would rise and say you cannot keep me down, They say a nomad roams this way, His steely gaze does not betray Any sign of what he’s looking for our here And if you feel son in your bones, Raindrops falling hard like stones, You’ll know that is the nomad passing near, I tried forget but at night it came, A tap tap tapping on my window pane, I turned and tossed but could not slow nor stop, The inexplicable need to tell the nomad of my name, I packed a bag and wrote a will, Said I’ve taken all I own but still, Please pass on these words to all who ask, For once and all now is the time, Answers I have gone to find, To meet the nomad may be my final task They say a nomad haunts these halls, His whispers like a nightmare calls, To ask me if I’d care to step inside, “Step forth only at your risk”, There is no blade nor amour fit, To save you now your only hope’s to hide, But surely did I dare to tread, With beads of sweat dripping from my head, Inside the creaking doorway of his lair, Golden torches ordained the walls, But after some hours my progress stalled, As the nomad said to me it’s rude to stare, Let me ask you nomad is it true, All the tales they tell about you, They say that you’re devil that’s been cut loose, He snarled at me as he quickly turned, Said “only stay if you’re here to learn” Sit on my throne and I’ll sing to you the truth One day in a cold October after quite some time had passed, I did return home to many whispers and suspicion, “how have you returned at all when you went and walked the nomads halls” I said “gather round my friends it’s time to listen” As the sun went down and turned to night, I sensed in them an awful fright but I lit a fire and said hear me as I say, But no words were heard it was quite absurd, So I stood to leave but then as I turned, I remembered how the nomad began to play, Speak quietly of the villagers here, And be silent if they frown, I heard they chased one of their own right out of town, There was some complication, With a monstrous abhorration, So if you ever speak of the nomad keep it down, They say a nomad walks these lands, With razored nails carved in his hands, If you see him it’ll be the last thing that you do, In fact if rumours are to be believed, On the reliable word of 5 blind thieves, They said there was one nomad now there’s 2 And you can hear them singing
You used to come and see me, About the same time everyday When the birds would start to sing, And the sun would fade away, You never returned my conversation, Maybe that’s why it worked so well, I haven’t seen you lately, But I hope you’re doing swell, I used to tell my wife, When you’d drop down in the evening, I’d say hey there look who’s back And he’s sure looking pretty good, Used to make me smile, for a little while, I’d say hey my friend I like your style, And then I’d go and ask my wife if we should I’d say Do you think he should come inside, Seemed like a pretty good idea at the time, But on reflection I didn’t think it through, She said, Don’t worry man he’s where he’s meant to be, The outside’s in his biology, I said geez your right I really should have knew, Over time you visits became a little more inconsistent, And I wondered if you’d fallen out with me, But then one day I saw you again and it soon became extraordinarily plain, That by the size of your belly it was obvious that you were a she, So I said, Do you think she should come inside, Seemed like a pretty good idea at the time, But on reflection maybe I didn’t think it through, She said, Don’t be crazy, if she’s gonna have babies she’s gonna wanna be at home, But don’t worry love that little spot she’s got it’s like a penthouse that she owns, I said I know you’re right she’s gonna be alright, In the little spot above the window I know, I was just a little concerned that she’d be up there all alone, And for some time I watched for you, Hoping that you’d come bouncing down, But after quite some time had passed I knew I wouldn’t be seeing you around, My wife would ask me what’s the issue, I said I can’t talk now just pass the tissues,I honestly don’t know what I’m gonna do, But then I saw out my corner eye, A beautiful sight it nearly made me cry, I saw 3 little friends drop down just then and they looked a lot like you, Do you think they should come inside, Seemed like a pretty good idea at the time, But on reflection maybe I didn’t think it through, She said don’t worry man they’re where they’re meant to be, They’ll never be lonely now there’s 3, But at least they know they’ve got a friend down here in you, So goodbye friend just know I’ll miss you, And I’ll think about you now and then, I know I’ll never have another buddy like you come bouncing down again
This morning was an angel in my bed, She wore no halo and no crown adorned her head, Compulsion came like the summer rain to look before I left, I tried to speak but she'd taken all of my breath, And do you feel the earth breathing, Do you see the night sleeping, Do you feel my heart beating, Cos I'm gonna shine, lover in the light of you, Yes I'm gonna shine, lover in the light of you, Love like this it won't change, Started now it won't fade, Your champagne, cocaine, Can't contain or abstain, I hope you catch my drift, That babe the last time that we kissed, I should have said it should have asked, You've been in my head but now it's passed
Do you know It’s been a while since I let you go And I’ve been thinking ‘bout the flowers that say best baby please don’t go Then I’ll bring April showers so my love for you can grow I could make a jungle just with my love for you I’d build you a little treehouse if you let me, I would show you stars And then I’d give you all my heart And then we’d know that this right here is our tree Over time We’d just keep growing upwards ‘til we’re living in the sky And birds would stop and stay a while, because you’d ask them all inside, You’d give them cupcakes you had made and they’d say thank you and goodbye Man you must be crazy, Why would I come down from up here, This big ‘ol tree is good for me we’ve been living here all year You could give me shelter and baby I would give you shade, Inside the little treehouse we had made, And leaves would turn from hues of green To the prettiest flames I’ve ever seen, Apart of course from the fire in your eyes, Just like I told you right from the start I know we’re never gonna be apart We’re gonna make everyday the best day of our lives I wonder if, We’ll ever go back down it would be quite a trip, I wonder if much change has passed and if we’d remember why, We built our little treehouse here way up in the sky, I told you I could build a palace for you, Just out of sticks and leaves, You told me love our little treehouse is all I’ll ever need, You said I’m tired now, can you take me back to the place that we call home, I kind of like just living on our own Someday soon, I wonder if we’ll have to go and build another room, But me and you be stuck like glue of that I have no doubt, Things are gonna change round here, but that’s what life’s all about We’ll have to grow like flowers just like we’ve learned to do, In all the days that got us here and my love how that time flew, Maybe when there’s more of us, we’ll miss the things we did But from where I’m stood up here with you, that’s a hell of a way to live
See the Breaking Cover album page


released May 12, 2018

All tracks written and recorded by Ray Zimmerman
All instruments played and recorded by Ray Zimmerman
Production and Mastering by Ray Zimmerman and Lucy Sutcliffe


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